LTF 52: Relying on a Spiritual Teacher; Necessary Qualifications

We have this with verse 62: 

[62] Sage (Buddha) has said that reliance on a spiritual teacher (brings) complete fulfillment of the spiritual life. Therefore, rely on hallowed beings. So many have attained the peace (of nirvana) by having relied on the triumphant ones. 

The place of the spiritual teacher is, of course, very central to and very important on the Buddhist path. The reason for that is not just to have somebody that gives us information, because we can get information from books. And it’s not just to have somebody that explains things, because there are commentaries and so on, although, sometimes, the commentaries are very difficult to understand, and you need a living person to explain them, someone who can answer your questions and guide you in spiritual practice. That is, of course, very important, but many of us don’t have much contact with the great spiritual masters. We may be able to go to some of their large lectures, but hardly any of us will have the opportunity to get personal guidance from them, although we can take their general teachings as personal guidelines for us to practice. 

But the main function of the spiritual teacher is to give inspiration. “Inspiration” is sometimes translated as “blessing,” but I think that is a very misleading translation. It is inspiration – something that “uplifts” us, something that “brightens” us (if we look at the etymology of the words that are used in Sanskrit and Tibetan) and that helps to give energy to our spiritual practice. Such a teacher is a living example of what we are aiming for. It’s very helpful at the beginning to have a teacher who can inspire us to enter the path, who keeps us going on the path by continuing to be a source of inspiration, and who gives us inspiration to go all the way, to reach the goal. So, traditionally, the inspiration of the teacher is always explained as beneficial in the beginning, middle, and end of the path. 

Many Levels of Spiritual Teacher

We, of course, have many levels of spiritual teachers. This is something that I outline in my book on the spiritual teacher that I think is very important to understand and to realize.

We can have somebody, a teacher, who is like a professor, who just gives us information. It could be someone at a Buddhist center, it could be a Westerner, it could be a geshe (a Tibetan learned person), it could be someone at a university. We have to get the basic information. 

Then there is somebody who can be like a Dharma instructor. It could be a more experienced student or someone like that who can explain not just the information but how to relate it to life and who speaks in terms of experience.

Then there is somebody who could be a ritual trainer who basically trains us to how to set up an altar, how to sit in meditation, how to do meditation, how to use the various implements and stuff like that. That, also, is one level of a spiritual teacher. 

But the actual definition of a spiritual mentor is somebody from whom we receive vows. That could be the lay vows, the monastic vows, the bodhisattva vows or the tantric vows. Once we’ve received vows from them, they formally become a teacher in the strict Buddhist sense. Somebody that we take refuge with? It’s a little bit open to debate what that actually means. If a person hasn’t really examined the teacher, doesn’t know the teacher, and everybody is taking refuge from that teacher the first or second time they go to the Dharma center – one really needs to question whether or not that really is a taking of refuge, how sincere that is. But from the point of view of the actual text, it’s somebody like your abbot who gives monastic vows. That person becomes your pratimoksha teacher. That’s usually the level that it’s spoken of. Or it could be the one that we take the bodhisattva vows or the tantric vows from.

Now, when we talk about a root guru – a root guru is the one who gives us the most inspiration. It’s not necessarily the one who starts us on the path and not necessarily the one who gives us the most teachings. It’s somebody whose inspiration acts as a root for us to be able to grow. That’s why it’s called a “root” guru. And this is, of course, very, very important. If we don’t have somebody like that, then maybe we can get some inspiration from the biographies of the great spiritual masters or from the example of Buddha Sakyamuni himself until we find a living master who really inspires us. And it doesn’t have to be just one master; it could be several. 

Examining the Qualifications of the Teacher

In any case, what is crucial in relying on a spiritual master and studying and training with a spiritual master and so on is to examine the qualifications of the person, to examine their good qualities. This is absolutely essential. Many people in the West prematurely commit themselves to a spiritual teacher without having actually examined the qualities of that person. Then later on, they find that this person isn’t really very well qualified, and they find many faults in the spiritual teacher. This is very much a shame because people then sometimes get discouraged and think that Buddhism is no good or that it’s not for them just because the teacher turned out to not meet their expectations, basically – all because they didn’t examine the teacher very well. 

In the classical texts, they say that we need to examine the teacher, and the teacher needs to examine us for many, many years – up to nine years or twelve years, something like that. The example that is often given is Atisha. He made this long journey to Sumatra (I think it took something like fifteen months to get there by ship and lots and lots of problems on the way) in order to study with Serlingpa, who was the great master of bodhichitta. And when he got there, he didn’t go immediately to this teacher. Instead, he spent quite a lot of time finding out about the teacher, asking the other disciples of the teacher and so on, before he actually went to meet him. 

So, that’s given as an example, one that Serkong Rinpoche, I think it was, used to use, saying that we shouldn’t be like a starving dog that will just gobble up anything that is thrown to it. We should be discriminating and examine the teacher very, very well. And if we look at the qualities of the teacher as explained in Maitreya’s text, Mahayanasutra-alamkara (A Filigree of Mahayana Sutras), we find there a list of ten qualities that are very important for the spiritual teacher to have. 

The Ten Necessary Qualities of the Spiritual Teacher According to Maitreya

• The first of these is ethical self-discipline 

Ethical self-discipline means that they don’t act in destructive ways, like using harsh language, killing, stealing, engaging in inappropriate sexual behavior, lying and all these sorts of things. The teacher has ethical self-control. That is very, very important. Sometimes, there are teachers who are very abusive and who don’t seem to follow this, and the students justify it, saying, “Well, this is crazy wisdom,” and so on. But that is really not an appropriate attitude at all. The teacher needs also to restrain from intoxicants – this type of thing. Ethical self-discipline. That comes from the training in higher exceptional discipline.

• The second one is a serenely stilled and settled awareness 

This refers to the teacher’s development of the training in higher concentration. The teacher’s mind has to be concentrated, focused. When they’re teaching, for instance, they have to stay concentrated, be able to teach, remember what they said if somebody asks a question – these types of things – and not just have their minds wander all over the place. They have to be steady. 

• The third quality is a mind freed from the various obscurations

That refers to the result of having trained in higher discriminating awareness. In other words, as a result of training in the understanding of voidness and so on, the teacher is someone who, if not totally free from every single disturbing emotion, has a very, very low level of jealousy, arrogance, greed, attachment, anger, hostility and these types of things. On the concentration side, it’s not somebody who gets depressed or overly hyperactive and so on but, instead, is steady and not under the control of the disturbing emotions. Sure, sometimes, a low level of these might arise, but basically, they have that very, very low. 

• The fourth quality is that they have more knowledge than ourselves, than the student 

More knowledge than the student in, obviously, the Dharma, in what they are teaching. They may not know more about science, if the student is a scientist, or about medicine, if the student is a doctor. That’s not the point. The point is that they have to have more knowledge of the Dharma than the student in order for the student to learn from the teacher, obviously. There are many cases…  we find cases with Tsongkhapa, in fact, in which he established a relationship with a teacher in which they were mutually students and teachers of each other. This is possible – that the student is more learned in one area of Dharma than the teacher and that the teacher is more learned than the student in yet another area of the Dharma and that they share teachings with each other. This is quite common among the high lamas, the great lamas. So, here, “more knowledge than ourselves” refers to what we want to learn from the teacher. 

• The fifth one is enthusiasm 

That’s joyous perseverance. The teacher enjoys teaching, takes joy in the Dharma, joy in practice, perseveres with it… joy in teaching. So, that enthusiasm, that perseverance, is the fifth quality.

• The sixth one is a wealth of scriptural quotations 

They need to know the Buddhist texts and be able to refer to them, not just teach in general. This is why, very often, you find that the great teachers will teach from a text. Someone like His Holiness the Dalai Lama, when he teaches, is constantly quoting. He quotes more various sources than anybody because he has an unbelievable photographic memory and has memorized more than anybody. He has a huge wealth of material that he can draw on to illustrate what he is saying. This is important in the teachings. It’s important to be able to have confidence that what the teacher is teaching is authentic, that these are authentic teachings of the Buddha and the great masters. So, if the teacher can give the references, quotations, even if it’s not exactly word for word, it is important for the students. 

• The seventh one is a deep and stable realization of reality 

That refers to a deep and stable understanding of voidness. It’s on that basis that the disturbing emotions will be very, very weak – or gone, if they are a liberated being. They need not just to be able to give the words about voidness but to have actually actualized that insight so that, in their daily lives, they act on that basis. 

• The eighth quality is the ability to express themselves clearly 

If someone is going to teach, they need to be able to explain in a way that is clear to the student. That means being able to answer questions well, being able to explain well, being able to explain on different levels to people of different levels of intelligence and different levels of background – so, both beginners and very advanced and people who are not very intellectually gifted as well as those who are extremely intellectually gifted. The teacher needs to be able to express clearly these terms. Also, for the different audiences – if they are teaching people from different countries, different cultural backgrounds, they need to be able to express things clearly, in a way that people can relate to with examples from their own ordinary lives.

• The ninth one is a nature of intense loving concern 

This is the only motivation of the teacher. They must be deeply concerned about the welfare of the students – with love, wanting them to be happy, and with compassion, wanting them to be free from suffering. And they are willing to involve themselves in terms of teaching and helping the student in whatever way would be beneficial in the long term. 

Sometimes, the teacher has to be very harsh and very strong in terms of what would be beneficial. Marpa sent Milarepa away to the caves. Milarepa undoubtedly wanted to stay with Marpa, but Marpa saw that the long-term benefit would be for him to go off to the caves in solitary retreat. So, he sent him off. Also, Marpa gave Milarepa a really difficult time before he would teach him – having him build all those towers, which weren’t good enough, so Milarepa had to take them down and build another one. That was out of loving concern. 

Loving concern doesn’t mean treating somebody like a baby and always giving them what they want and patting them on the head and, “Oh, you’re so nice. You’re so great.” Out of loving concern, sometimes the teacher can be very forceful, very strict. I always give this example of my own teacher, Serkong Rinpoche. I served him for nine years. He said “thank you” to me twice in nine years for all the work that I did for him. And that was very, very beneficial – because what was I helping him for? In order to get a pat on the head and to wag my tail? To tell me how wonderful I am for helping him to help other people? You don’t do these things for thanks or for “Oh, you’re so wonderful.” But of course, as a teacher, one has to be very skillful and know what the appropriate methods are for this student or that student. For some students, that might be very beneficial; for other students, that might be very difficult. So, a nature of intense loving concern.

• The tenth one is somebody who has given up ever feeling that teaching is tiresome 

In other words, they never get tired of teaching. I mean they might get tired after ten hours of explaining and need to take a break. We’re not talking about that. We’re talking about when a student doesn’t understand – that they don’t give up and say, “Oh, you’re hopeless. I’m tired of trying to explain to you.” Or when the student never remembers… Geshe Dhargyey used to teach day in and day out, year after year after year, at the library in Dharamsala. One really wonders how much any of the students remembered what he said. Yet, he never lost his enthusiasm. Always the same every day. Never got tired of teaching. So, this is also an important quality that the teacher has. 

Yeah, Karsten?

Participant: Where was he trained? In which monastery?

Dr. Berzin: Where was Geshe Dhargyey trained? Sera Je. He was born in some very remote area of Kham. The closest monastery to where he was born was a Sakya monastery. So, he started out in a Sakya monastery. I don’t know exactly, but given that he’s Ngawang Dhargyey, I assume that he was at Dhargyey Monastery for a while, in Kham, before he came to Sera Je. Then he studied there and got his geshe degree there. 

Actually, I don’t know that he got his geshe degree at Sera Je. He might have gotten it in India, at Buxaduar Camp, after they came out. I don’t know, actually, which year he got the geshe degree. He was born in 1925. They came out in ‘59. He would have been thirty-five-years-old when they came out, so he must have already had his geshe degree before he came out. 

So, these are the ten qualities that Maitreya lists. There are many other qualities that are emphasized. Some of the most important of those are that the teacher not have any pretension, that they don’t pretend to have good qualities that they don’t have, and that they aren’t dishonest in the sense that they don’t try to hide the shortcomings that they have. If they don’t know something, they say they don’t know; they don’t just make up something. If they say they can’t do this or that, they just say it; they don’t pretend. So, this is a very important quality of teacher. They’re humble, not arrogant. And they have respect, respect not only for their own teachers but respect for the students – not treat them like dogs. 

It is very difficult, of course, to find somebody who has all ten of these qualifications. But Sakya Pandita said in his Precious Treasury of Elegant Sayings, “Just as it is rare for someone to have all good qualities, it’s also rare for someone to have no good qualities at all. So, therefore, the wise commit themselves wholeheartedly to someone who, out of a mixture of faults and good qualities, has mostly good points.” 

So, we look at these qualifications, these qualities. And even if the teacher can’t explain terribly well but they have loving concern and ethics, and they don’t have these disturbing emotions, and they try very hard and are very enthusiastic – that’s OK. See what the most important qualifications are. Certainly, the motivation of the teacher is very high on that list – the ethics and the proper motivation, teaching out of real, sincere concern for the student.

What It Means to Commit Ourselves to a Spiritual Teacher

Now, when we actually make that relationship with the spiritual teacher… I mean, there is a formal making of a relationship, which is when you take vows from the teacher. It really is not the case, at least I’ve not seen this among the Tibetans, that someone says, “You be my spiritual teacher; you be my guru” and this type of thing. That’s not necessarily the way that it is done – this sort of a romantic way, like out of a novel. But people certainly do go to a teacher and ask if they would teach them something. That certainly is the case. But it’s quite rare now-a-days, especially in the West, to get private instruction from a great teacher. But one can ask to join a class and so on. 

But there is a period of time of examining the teacher, and a period of time where you actually commit yourself wholeheartedly to that teacher. And that commitment, if we speak of it formally, is not just to somebody that we take the vows from and so on. It’s someone that we go on a deeper level with, someone who will actually work with us on a more personal level to help us to improve our personality, basically, to overcome our disturbing emotions and so on. Then that commitment is “no matter what you do, no matter what you say, I am not going to get angry with you. I’m going to see it as a teaching. In this sense, you are a Buddha for me. You are teaching the Dharma, and everything that you do is a teaching.” 

So, obviously, we have to have examined the teacher very, very well beforehand to make sure that that person will act in an ethical way for our own best interest and will not be abusive toward us. And we ourselves need to be mature enough to be able to take whatever rough emotional treatment that teacher will give us because it’s under those circumstances that we develop our personality, we develop our patience, we develop our perseverance, we overcome our selfishness, and so on. 

It’s like when I was translating for Serkong Rinpoche. I would get to a point where I would be really tired and felt that I couldn’t go on. When I reached that point, Serkong Rinpoche would never stop. He would always go on for at least another five or ten minutes because he said, “No matter how tired you are, you can always do another five or ten minutes,” in order to push me beyond my limits. That’s part of the contract. You don’t say, “Sorry, I’m too tired. Forget it,” or get angry. So, it is not an easy type of relationship, but it’s one that you enter into very willingly. 

And it’s not something that has to be with a formal type of communication – that one says, “OK you’re my guru. Please train me,” although sometimes, it can be like that. I said to Serkong Rinpoche, “Please” – I used the standard phrase from the Dharma: “Make a donkey like me into a human being.” I asked him to help me gain the ability to socially interact with others in a beneficial way, not in my previous ways, which were not at all very helpful. So, in a sense, I did formally ask him, but that’s not always the case. 

Now, when we have that commitment to the spiritual teacher, there are certain ways in which we need to rely on that teacher that will make the reliance on the teacher a healthy reliance. It’s very important that it be healthy, that it not be a sick neurotic type of dependency. “Oh, Guru, Guru, Lama, Lama, tell me what to do,” and we give up all responsibility for our lives. It’s not like that. 

Teacher is teaching us to be able to stand on our two feet, which means that the teacher has to not be attached, not cling to the students, which is sometimes not so easy from the side of the teacher. But a healthy manner is not a dependency. It’s not a blind type of following either; it’s not like being in the army. One asks the teacher for general advice if one doesn’t know what to do. Or more usual, more mature, is to say to the teacher, for instance, “I would like to do this or do that. Do you have any objections? Do you see any trouble with that?” This is a more mature way of approaching the teacher for advice. Sometimes, the teacher will say, “Yes, this is very good. This is all right.” Other times the teacher will say, “No, not so good.” 

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher with Our Thoughts

When it comes to relating to a teacher in a healthy way, we can do so with our thoughts, our attitude, our actions, and our behavior. The way to relate with our thoughts is basically to have (a) firm conviction in the good qualities of the teacher and (b) appreciation of the teacher’s kindness. These are the two things that are emphasized always. 

So, one needs to look at the qualities of the teacher. The Fifth Dalai Lama, in his lam-rim, said it very well. He said that, first, you look at the shortcomings of the teacher; you don’t deny them. No point in denying. In fact, it’s quite unhealthy to deny what the shortcomings of the teacher might be. But there’s also no benefit whatsoever to be gained from dwelling and focusing on the shortcomings of the teacher. No benefit from complaining, no benefit from criticizing. But you don’t deny either. “I am aware that this teacher is busy and has thousands of students and, so, will not have time for me personally.” That’s a shortcoming, and it’s something that some students might be really upset about. “I want to be special.” Everybody thinks they’re a Milarepa and that they’re so special. So, one doesn’t deny that this is a shortcoming in the relationship. “The teacher will not have personal time for me. But, OK. I’m not going to complain about that. I’m not going to stay fixated on that.” Then you look at the actual good qualities. And this has to be based on being able to recognize those qualities.

Yes, Karsten?

Participant: Let’s say somebody wants to follow His Holiness the Dalai Lama. So, it could be helpful to read some chapters of these weird books that are written by his opponents, like these Trimondi people. What’s their name? Like the Black Dalai Lama and his followers or something like this.

Dr. Berzin: Right. So, if we want to follow His Holiness the Dalai Lama as our spiritual teacher, could it be helpful to read some of these books by the Trimondi couple that come up with all these ideas about the Dalai Lama plotting to take over the world and preparing everybody for the Shambhala war and so on? No. I don’t think that that’s helpful in the slightest because those books are totally inaccurate, total fantasies of paranoia. So, that’s not helpful at all. If you’re going to look at the shortcoming of a teacher, it should be an actual shortcoming. And as I say, the most innocent shortcoming is that the teacher is busy with so many other students and so many other things that they are never going to have time for us personally. That’s a fact. So, no point in complaining about that.

Participant: But on this thing that you mentioned before, the personal contact where the teacher asks you to do something – that can’t happen.

Dr. Berzin: So, right. Having a personal contact, a personal relationship, with someone like His Holiness the Dalai Lama in which they ask you to do this or that and who works with you personally – you won’t be able to have that unless you are some super special person. But you can get your main inspiration from His Holiness the Dalai Lama. Now, to get someone who will actually work with you personally? That’s pretty rare, I must say. That’s pretty rare. But there are cases. There are these big Dharma organizations, for example, in which there are a lot of people who work for that organization, and the teacher who is in charge of it tells them to do this or to do that and so on. That, maybe, is closest that many people get. 

The thing is that you have to make an awfully strong commitment to the teacher and, basically, serve them in some way in order to have that type of interaction. The student needs to take that initiative. The teacher isn’t going to run after the student. The student needs to run after the teacher.

Participant: But in the case of His Holiness, it’s not possible. So, how can you do without this personal relationship? You just can take the inspiration, but what else can… 

Dr. Berzin: Well, so the question is, “How can we relate to His Holiness the Dalai Lama because we won’t have that personal interaction?” The inspiration will have to be enough – the inspiration and the teachings. And the example. 

If you really learn and remember what His Holiness teaches, then in various situations in life, that teaching will come up. Didn’t Atisha say that one of the outstanding qualities of the lam-rim is that, through that, you see everything that Buddha taught as a personal guideline? Maybe it wasn’t Atisha; maybe it was Tsongkhapa who first said that. I don’t know. In any case, if you can see all that His Holiness teaches as personal advice to you, then you can look at that as being a little bit of personal guidance. In other words, one has to work with whatever one can get. 

But the student has to be qualified. Often, we as students might not be really qualified to take the full type of relation with the teacher. As I was saying, the teacher can be very, very tough. Extremely tough. And if we argue back – that’s not beneficial. We can debate, of course, in a formal debate. That’s another thing. But not on the basis of getting angry. It’s not easy to have that kind of relation with a teacher. It really isn’t. If we have other types of responsibilities, other things going on in our lives – with work, family and other things that we’re doing – there’s only a certain level of interaction we can have with the teacher. The teacher, then, is just one little part of our lives. 

What is the model that they are talking about in Buddhism? The model is in a monastery in which you are doing nothing else. And you are probably living in the house of the teacher. So, that’s a very different model. Or you’re associated with the household of the teacher, maybe not in the actual, same building. So, it’s that type of situation.  

But these qualities that we are talking about here regarding how you relate to the spiritual teacher, are ones, I think, that anybody can apply at any level of relationship with the teacher, proved that you’ve examined the teacher well, you have firm conviction in their good qualities, and that firm conviction is based on the good qualities. 

The Three Criteria for Valid Cognition

Seeing the good qualities has to be a valid seeing of the good qualities. So, then we go back to Chandrakirti’s three criteria for evaluating a valid cognition. 

• First, it has to accord with convention. 

So, there is an accepted convention, as we just saw in Maitreya’s text, concerning what the qualities of a teacher are. So, the good qualities that you see in the teacher need to be in accordance with what the texts actually say, with what the convention is regarding the good qualities of a teacher. So, it’s not that they are entertaining and charismatic and things like that. That’s not necessarily a good quality of the teacher. Serkong Rinpoche said the teacher isn’t there to entertain you. A clown in the circus is to entertain you, not a teacher. 

• It (these good qualities) has to not be contradicted by a valid cognition of conventional truth. 

A lot of people can fool themselves into thinking, “Oh, what a wonderful, healthy relationship it is.” You see this in marriage relationships. “Oh, it’s OK. It’s OK.” Everybody outside looking at it sees that it’s actually an abusive situation, but the person in the relationship doesn’t see it. So, there are people who are valid sources of cognition; they see validly and objectively. You need to see that this is a healthy relationship and that this person actually has the qualities that you think this person has. It’s not a sick relationship, and it’s not you just fantasizing because of being in love with the teacher or being intimidated by an authoritarian teacher and so on. It has to not be contradicted by valid conventional cognition.

And then:

• It has to not be contradicted by valid cognition of the deepest truth. 

In other words, if we think, “Oh, the teacher is inherently, from their own side, so wonderful. They’re so great, and I can never be like that,” and all these sorts of things – that is contradicted by someone who understands voidness. The teacher achieved their qualities based on cause and effect, and it’s something that we can achieve ourselves – if we put in the effort.

So, we look at the actual good qualities of the teacher, whatever they may be and to whatever degree they may be there. We examine the teacher by looking at their interactions with others, by knowing a little bit about their history, by looking at their interactions with their own teachers, and these types of things.

The Three Levels of Belief

Then we focus on the teacher with three levels of belief. When we talk about belief in Buddhism, we’re talking about belief in facts (dad-pa). We believe a fact to be true. It’s not like believing that there’s Santa Claus, or that “oh, I believe it’s going to be good weather tomorrow,” which is just a guess. So, we’re talking about a fact. A teacher has these qualities. It is a fact, and we believe that fact to be true. 

• The first of these is a clearheaded belief in a fact to be true. 

So, the qualities are clear to us. And by focusing on these qualities and being convinced that the teacher has them, our minds are cleared of disturbing attitudes toward the teacher, disturbing attitudes like doubt or arrogance – “I’m so much better” – or anger, disappointment, etc.

• The second type is belief in a fact to be true that is based on logic. 

In other words, teacher put in this and this type of training, these types of causes, and that’s the result. So, based on logic, we see that they have these qualities Also, we can infer that they have these qualities based on observing their behavior and the effect that they have on other people. 

• The third type is belief a fact to be true that involves an aspiration, or a wish. 

In other words, you look at these qualities, and you’re convinced that the teacher has these qualities, and it engenders in you the great aspiration, or wish, to develop these qualities yourself.

That’s a meditation process, actually. You go through these three steps when thinking of the good qualities of the teacher. 

In fact, this is a very beneficial meditation to do with anybody that we have a close relationship with. We look to see what their shortcomings and negative qualities are. We don’t deny that they have them, but we also realize that criticizing and complaining is not going to help; it is just going to get us down. So, OK, these are the shortcomings. Then we look at the good qualities and gain the conviction that they actually are good qualities. And based on those good qualities, we can feel respect for the person, gain inspiration from the person and develop a more beneficial relationship with the person. So, this is helpful in any relationship, but particularly with the teacher. 

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher with Our Emotions

Then, naturally, we would feel love for the teacher. But it’s not like feeling love for our sexual partner. That’s not the same type of love that we are talking about. We’re talking about a love that is a heartwarming, uplifting feeling, one that is very joyous and, also, very serene, you know, in terms of calm. It’s based on admiration and respect, but without inflating the qualities of the person and without being naive about the person. And it’s a love that doesn’t disturb our minds. Sometimes, with ordinary love, we get so excited that our minds are not at all calm. So, this type of emotional quality is there, mixed with a deep, deep admiration and respect for the person.

Appreciating the Kindness of The Teacher

 Oh, I’m sorry. Also, there is the appreciation of the kindness of the teacher. So, there’s relating with our thoughts, being firmly convinced of their good qualities, and then there’s appreciation of their kindness, also the kindness that they have to teach us. Buddhas aren’t around. So, even if it’s just our daily teacher in our Dharma center, we appreciate the kindness that they actually teach. We don’t have His Holiness the Dalai Lama around all the time. We don’t have Buddha around all the time. So, they’re very kind to help us and not to get fed up with us when we don’t remember the teachings, when we don’t learn. Even though (I love to give this example), when I asked Serkong Rinpoche a word that I didn’t understand in Tibetan and he scolded me saying, “I explained that word to you seven years ago. I remember explaining it to you, why don’t you remember?” – despite that, that was very kind. Very, very kind. It’s important to be able to remember and so on. 

That appreciation of the kindness of the teacher also has to be free of disturbing emotions, disturbing attitudes. So, that means without pride, thinking, “Oh, I’m the special student; he’s been so kind to me,” without attachment, and without guilt, feeling, “Oh, I don’t deserve this kindness.” Instead, it’s just to appreciate what the teacher is doing, what the teacher has done for us, what the teacher does in general to benefit others.

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher with Our Actions 

Then, relating with our actions, based on appreciating their work – first of all, you support their work, support what they are doing. This can be either materially, financially, or whatever it might be, and offering… as they say in the texts, offering even your family. What does that mean? It can mean, for instance, that if the teacher lives by themselves and is alone, you invite the teacher to the Christmas dinner, or something like that, with your family. You share your family with them so that they can have a little bit of that family warmth and togetherness – provided, of course, that you have a nice family setting and relationship, not one of these horrible things where everybody is screaming at each other. So, you share. You support their work by giving them various things, giving them your time and, as it always explains in the text, the material things, the financial means, to help them do their work so that they don’t have to have an extra job but, instead, can devote all their time to teaching and writing and helping the students. You support the teacher.

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher by Offering Help

The next one is to offer help. Offering help can be cooking for them, writing letters for them, running to get visas for them (like I used to do all the time for Serkong Rinpoche so that he could travel to other countries and teach), work the computer to record the teachings – anything that helps the teacher to be able to teach more and to help other people more. Clean the house… whatever. Walk the dog. These are different types of ways in which you offer help. And it’s based on respect. 

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher by Showing Respect

Showing respect is also important. There are many ways of showing respect. It doesn’t have to be in a traditional, Asian way of making prostrations or presenting a white kata scarf. For Western people that’s pretty weird. If a Western person did it to another Western person, it would seem quite inappropriate.   

So, there are many other ways of showing respect. You show respect by coming to the teachings on time, for example. If you’re going to be late or if you can’t come, you tell the teacher beforehand. That’s showing respect. If the teacher asks you to do something, you report back when you’ve done it. That’s showing respect. If the teacher calls for some reason, leaves a message on your answering machine, or sends an email, you call back. That’s showing respect. 

There are many ways of showing respect that fit perfectly well with our culture. When the teacher starts to teach, you stop talking to each other. You do that in class in school. So, there are simple ways like that of showing respect. It should not be that you are just following a rule but that you actually feel respect for the teacher, for their qualities, for what they are doing, for their kindness. 

Relating to the Spiritual Teacher by Taking the Teacher’s Advice

The last one here is to take the teacher’s advice. That’s based on trusting the teacher. This is a very, very important part of the relationship. You trust the teacher. You trust that the teacher’s not going to take advantage of you, not going to abuse you, not going to exploit you, and you trust that the teacher is an authoritative, reliable source of advice concerning spiritual matters. Iif they don’t know, you trust that they will tell you that they don’t know (that, of course, is based on having examined the teacher very, very well); they don’t just pretend to know what they don’t know. 

When it comes to taking the advice of the teacher, you don’t go to the teacher for every tiny, little thing like a baby. That’s a dependency relationship. That’s sick. The teacher isn’t your parent. And you’re not a little child. But you ask for advice with things that you really aren’t able to answer or figure out for yourself. 

I once went to Serkong Rinpoche to ask advice about my house in Dharamsala (there was some problem about the rent). He basically scolded me, which he often did, saying, “Why do you come to me? Go to a lawyer.” So, you go to a teacher with appropriate questions for the teacher. You don’t go to a monk or a nun to ask advice about your sexual relationship with your partner, about your marriage problems. You don’t go to a monk or a nun for that. That’s not appropriate. 

Emulating the Spiritual Teacher

Then we try to emulate the teacher, follow the example of the teacher. That doesn’t mean to become a clone– that if they drink butter tea, we drink butter tea, or that if they speak broken English, we speak broken English. It doesn’t mean that. It’s that we try to follow the example of the teacher, really sincerely devoting our lives to working on ourselves in the Dharma way and working on trying to help others. In that way, we follow the example of the teacher. 

Pleasing the Spiritual Teacher

When we hear the phrase “to please the teachers,” that we want to “please” our teachers – what does that mean? The explanation of the word “to please,” here, means “to come close to” the teacher in the sense of modeling ourselves after them, following their advice to transform our minds and to help all beings. So, we please them by coming close to their example. That example is of transforming our minds, our behavior and so on in a beneficial way, working on ourselves and helping others. That’s what pleases the teacher. It’s not that we give them gifts or whatever or that we’re going to bribe the teacher so that “my teacher will like me.” That’s very childish.

So, these are some of the major points that are related to the relationship with the spiritual teacher. As Nagarjuna writes, “Sage (Buddha) has said that reliance on a spiritual master (brings) complete fulfillment of a spiritual life.” 

So, we can see that developing this way of looking at the good qualities and focusing on the good qualities helps us very much in our spiritual lives because then we, as well, are focused on achieving good qualities. We’re inspired by someone who has developed those qualities based on training and hard work, both in this lifetime and previous lifetimes (if they’re born with various talents and so on), and we can focus on those good qualities with aspiration and kindness, setting them as goals for ourselves. The teacher has been very kind: we can be very kind to others as well. So, it brings fulfillment of a spiritual life. “Therefore,” Nagarjuna writes, “rely on hallowed beings.” “Hallowed” is usually translated as “holy” or “sacred,” but it means really special spiritual great beings. “So many have attained the peace (of nirvana) by having relied on the triumphant ones.” So, those who have achieved liberation and enlightenment have done so by relying on a spiritual teacher. Therefore, it’s very important not to have a wrong view of the role of spiritual teachers in Buddhism, particularly Tibetan Buddhism. 

Worshiping the Guru (Lamaism) Is Not the Buddhist Way

Sometimes, Tibetan Buddhism is called “Lamaism.” That, actually, is the Chinese term; it is not at all found in Sanskrit or Tibetan. Again, it comes from quite a misunderstanding of Tibetan Buddhism. Tibetan Buddhism, after all, is based on Indian Buddhism. All these references about the spiritual teacher come from the original Sanskrit sources. There, you don’t have guru worship. 

Now, there may be some people who idolize His Holiness the Dalai Lama, and from outside, it might look as though they are worshiping him, but that is certainly not what is advised. You don’t worship him. Because some people look at the fact that people do prostration and long-life prayers and all sorts of special things for His Holiness, they might think that they are worshiping him. He’s not a god. Therefore, again, worship is based on a false view of reality It’s seeing the person as way up there on a pedestal, inherently so wonderful: “They’re a god, and I’m so miserable down here. And I will worship you. Take pity on me. Save me.” That’s not the Buddhist way. 

Respect, admiration, trust – that’s not worship. So, we have to be very clear about what the proper attitude toward the spiritual teacher is in Buddhism… and the benefits of it. And even if we don’t have access to the most qualified teacher in the universe, we have access to some that may be very inspiring. The teachers that we work with every day or every week… as Sakya Pandita explained, if they have more good qualities than bad qualities, well, we can learn something from them and appreciate what they do. We can respect and have conviction in what the actual reality of that person is. If they have more good qualities than we have, they can act as an inspiring example. 

OK. Do you have any questions?

Participant: Can you give some explanation about the lam-rim? 

Dr. Berzin: Well, I certainly can’t do that very well in the three minutes that are left in class. “Lam” means “path,” the spiritual path and a pathway of mind. It’s not a path that you walk on; it’s a type of mind that you develop that leads to liberation and enlightenment. And “rim” means the “stages” or “graded.” So, it’s a presentation of the basic Buddhist teachings having to do with the type of mind you would develop, step by step, in progression, in order to actually reach liberation and enlightenment. The way that it’s usually organized is in terms of levels of motivation. 

The first level of motivation is to have future lives that will be conducive for continuing on the path – so, as a human or in one of the god realms. Ultimately, what you want is to continue having precious human lives. So, that’s the first level of motivation, the initial level. 

The intermediate level of motivation is to achieve liberation from uncontrollable rebirth altogether, not just to get a nice human rebirth. You want to get out of this whole thing altogether, to become a liberated being, so that you’re not compulsively continuing on the basis of disturbing emotions and confusion and the impulses of karma that are generated by the disturbing emotions and confusion and that cause us to continue acting impulsively or compulsively. 

Then the advanced motivation is to reach enlightenment, to become a Buddha, so that you’re free not just of all these disturbing emotions and uncontrollable rebirth, or samsara, but that your mind is completely free of all obscurations. Being free of those would allow you to know all the causes for people being the way they are and all the effects of what you would teach them. When you know all things like that, you can actually help others as fully as is possible. 

So, the lam-rim presents all the basic teachings in this structure. It’s one way of organizing that basic material. There are several other ways of organizing it, but the material is exactly the same. And the material that we’re looking at now (the verses we are looking at), is the initial scope, the initial level of motivation – precious human rebirths, death and impermanence. Karma comes in there as well. If you want to avoid terrible future rebirths, you need to refrain from acting destructively. And the foundation for all of that is the relationship with the spiritual teacher. 

OK? Good. Anything else?

All right, why don’t we take one or two minutes to just digest what we’ve heard, and then we’ll end for the evening.