Last 5 Points of Mind Training, Deepest Bodhichitta

Developing Love and Compassion

Even in the material world, we can’t put all of our efforts into one strong move and expect to get immediate results. Instead, we need to work progressively in stages. This is true in terms of working on our mind and working on our attitudes. To improve our attitudes, we have to work gradually through stages. For instance, if we have a great deal of anger, we first have to learn to recognize our anger and then try to see all the drawbacks of getting angry, realizing that, from whatever point of view we take, anger is disadvantageous.

If we have a great deal of anger and have not trained ourselves properly, then when we try to apply the four opponent forces too strongly, we are not able to handle it. As Western psychologists and psychiatrists say, if we try to suppress our anger, it will cause a great deal of frustrated energy and harm. Instead, they suggest we try to release that anger in a more relaxed fashion to avoid the problems of having pent-up anger inside us.

To a certain extent, I think they have a point, because in certain circumstances we need to vent our anger in a peaceful manner if we are not yet ready to apply the opponents to get rid of it. However, we need to differentiate two distinct cases of feeling anger or arrogance. One situation is simply that if we don’t vent the anger and let out the energy, we end up with a lot of problems. Then there are other situations where venting just builds up the bad habit of indulging ourselves and always allowing ourselves to get angry. I think we have to distinguish the circumstances for each of these, and of course it is always best to control our anger or our arrogance. We need to learn not to have to let it out at all, but to take care of it internally without creating further problems for ourselves.

One of the main methods to use is to think of the opposite feeling to the one that is giving trouble. For instance, if we have anger, the opposite of that is love for others. So if we find ourselves getting angry with someone, we can try to feel loving, sincere concern for him or her. And more and more, we realize the advantages of having a loving attitude and the disadvantages of being angry, and in this way we are able to apply this opponent.

Even if we are unable to apply the opponent feeling in the situation – in this case, love – the more we familiarize ourselves with the disadvantages and drawbacks of anger, we will find that when a situation arises in which we start to get angry, the force of it gradually becomes less and less. In this way, we go through different stages of being able to handle and get rid of anger.

The same is true for developing compassion for others. Before we can have compassion for others and the wish for them to be free of their problems, we need to think about our own problems first, how we don’t want them, and how we would like to get rid of them. Then we’ll be able to develop sympathy and compassion for others based on our own feelings, coming from our own experience. All these positive states of mind are things that we work up to gradually, by stages.

If we say that we wish someone else to be free from problems and sufferings, and we ourselves don’t actually recognize the difficulties of our own problems and sufferings, how can we possibly develop a sincere wish for others to be free of their problems? If we observe somebody who is happy and content, it is rather difficult to develop a feeling of compassion for them, the wish for them to be free from problems. Yet, if we see somebody who is obviously experiencing difficulty, it is much easier to develop sympathy and this wish toward them. This, of course, is based on our own understanding of what a problem is, based on our own experience of them.

Compassion for someone is actually a type of attitude that can be seen in two ways. If it is aimed toward someone else, it is sympathy and compassion; if it is directed toward ourselves, it is what we call “determination to be free from our problems” or “renunciation.” It is the wish to be parted from suffering and problems, directed either toward ourselves, which is renunciation, or toward others, which is compassion.

When we think of suffering, such as being reborn in some of the worse states of rebirth – the joyless realms and so forth – we cannot assume that this is something far removed, something far-fetched that has no relation to us, or that there is no need to deal with it. We need to realize that the causes for being reborn in the worse states – all the various types of negative potentials – are built up and stored in our own mental continuums. Depending on the negative potentials in our own minds, it is very possible that at any point we could fall to one of the worse rebirth states. So it is very important to think in terms of behavioral cause and effect.

We need to reflect upon how fortunate we all are to have a precious human rebirth, a precious human life with abundant freedom and leisure to develop ourselves spiritually. Having this golden opportunity, it is very important not to waste it. So we think first about our precious human life, how difficult it is to attain and how easy it is to lose. This brings us to the thought of death and impermanence, since we can die at any time and don’t know when. We therefore remain strongly aware of the four noble truths: the nature of true sufferings, their true origins, the possibility of gaining a true stopping of these sufferings, and the true pathways of mind that we can develop to achieve that. This is how we take advantages of this precious life, by training in and building up all these states of mind.

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